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Opinion

He said vs. She said – Timely texting: An issue in relationships today

STORY BY JOE HERBA AND VICTORIA TRAMP

There is no greater confliction of feelings than that moment when you hear the *DING* from your phone and you look down and see it’s from your crush. You then ask your friend, “Do I look needy if I text her back right now?”

Your friend then begins to give you the timely texting lecture.

We’ve all been there, and it can be so stressful yet oh-so-exciting, but here are the tips and tricks for how to do it right.

First and foremost, never, and I mean absolutely, not in a million years, be that person that texts 24 hours after receiving the other person’s message, unles there is actually something going on. But if you are just trying to look cool, or like you don’t really care as much as you do, DON’T.

No one wants to text someone with one text a day. How weird is that? *DING* “Hey, what’s up?” ….. (24 hours later) *DING* “Nmu?” I was cringing just writing that.

This takes me to my next topic. Your partner will be more forgiving of your tardiness if you are interesting. Of course, nobody really enjoys a boring texter, but the only thing worse than a boring texter is a boring texter that hardly ever responds. From personal experience, I find that if you see the text and have time, why not respond?

Sometimes I’ll be texting a girl and you can obviously tell that neither of us are doing anything

and it’s just text after text flying back and forth, but obviously someone has to go and do something with your life rather than flirt over emojis, and the conversation stops.

Here is a tip: DON’T FREAK OUT.

Too many guys I know say, “We were texting for like an hour and now she hasn’t responded in like, literally, 20 minutes!”

Calm down. She clearly doesn’t hate you, but might have something called a life.

Twenty minutes may feel like forever if you are doing nothing but waiting for a text, but that’s nothing. People have lives, so dropped text conversations do happen, and it is nothing to freak out about.

Finally, I find all these timely texting rules, such as the “safe 7” (7 minutes before you text back, because it’s a random time and she will never believe that you actually thought about texting back in 7 minutes) or the “facetious 15” (15 minutes before you text back because you have to make her want to talk to you more and show that you are hard to get) absolutely ridiculous.

If you like someone, text them, and when they text you back, here’s a crazy idea: instead of looking at your watch, look at your phone and type in that little text box and click send.

I think you’ll be surprised what happens next… They’ll text back.

Many technical difficulties can occur when cell phone use is involved. This includes, but is not limited to, network issues, failed sent messages, failed received messages, group message lags, phone glitches, opened and forgot-about messages and crazy boyfriends/girlfriends that delete text messages from their significant others’ phones.

Most of the time, however, if the person repeatedly ignores text messages, you’re doing something wrong. Here are some key things that you may be doing wrong.

Problem number one: you’re having a boring conversation. If whoever you are texting is not interested in the conversation, you may be getting responses like, “okay,” “cool,” “awesome,” and “yeah”. These responses do not mean that anything is cool or awesome.Theseresponsesmean, “Why are you talking to me still?” and will soon be followed with no response.

Problem number two: you spam someone’s phone when they’re busy or not responding. This was something I had to learn the hard way. People simply cannot handle enthusiasm and attention from people as beautiful and exciting such as us.

Problem number three: you’re on Facebook Messenger, and you don’t actually know the person you’re attempting to get in contact with. THIS IS CREEPY. Yes, they know their read receipts

are on, and yes, they did ignore you on purpose. Facebook is not a good way to use your new, creepy pickup lines.

Problem number four: you only text them when you gain something. People want a mutual friendship.

Problem number five: you complain about everything. Your texting buddy cannot make you feel better if you don’t have a good mindset about it. Therefore, why bother? They’ll hit you with that no text back.

If any of these situations happen to fall into your lap, the best idea would be not to text them; if you do, they will still think you’re weird. Instead, confront them in person to discuss any issues and define your relationship.

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