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They chose…hopefully not poorly: “Indiana Jones 5” speculation

Photo Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

When I was a little kid, my personality consisted of: “Star Wars,” “Indiana Jones,” “Harry Potter,” Legos and a weird obsession with the Titanic. 

Back before I had any responsibilities, those were the only things I thought mattered in the entire world. One that still holds a special place in my heart is the ”Indiana Jones” franchise. 

I’m always surprised how many people say they’ve never seen any of the movies, considering critically, they are successful films and consist of many famous moments still continually referenced throughout pop culture. 

Well, for those who don’t know, “Indiana Jones” is the beautiful love child of filmmakers George Lucas (obviously known for creating “Star Wars”) and Steven Spielberg (who at the time was still an emerging filmmaker having his first success about six years prior with “Jaws”).

The two men came together and created a swashbuckling American classic about an archaeology professor in the late 1930s kicking Nazi ass and uncovering ancient secrets, like the Arc of the Covenant and the Holy Grail.

There are currently four films in the series, with the fifth one hitting theaters this summer. 

I, for one, enjoyed every film in the franchise. Yes, even the fourth was critically a failure and typically overlooked. I still thoroughly enjoyed it. At that point, everyone just assumed that was the end of the films.

I don’t think it came to anyone’s surprise, though, when Disney announced they would be making a fifth film to “conclude the saga” when they acquired the production company Lucasfilm back in 2012.

I’m personally quite excited about film number five, titled “The Dial of Destiny,” as the plot is largely unknown. All we know is it takes place in 1969 and revolves around the Space Race.

Of course, it’s also exciting to see Harrison Ford dawn the iconic hat and whip one final time. The film also brings back John Rhys-Davies, who’s reprising his role as Sallah, who was completely absent from the fourth film.

I say all this, but I will admit, I’m also scared there is the very real possibility that Disney may screw this up (cough cough, “Star Wars” sequels cough cough).

But again, with that said, Disney seemed to have learned their lesson as most new “Star Wars” content since then has been phenomenal. 

Plus, not to mention, Spielberg and Lucas are both returning as executive producers, so that, too, gives me hope. 

AND on top of that, as opposed to Han Solo in “Star Wars,” Harrison Ford loves the character of Indiana Jones. I don’t think he would’ve agreed to return for a final installment had the finale been anything less than great. 

That brings me to the next thing: is this really the end? 

Let’s be real. Indy is a money maker; that’s just a fact. Do we really think the authoritative monopoly that is the Walt Disney Company is really going to let Indy die? 

If we’re going to be real here, good ol’ Lord Mickey is going to milk every last penny out of Dr. Jones. 

My obvious prediction is that it won’t include Ford anymore after this. I mean, come on, the man is 80 years old. You can only run from so many boulders, swing over so many ravines and melt so many Nazi faces before your age catches up to you.

I wouldn’t be opposed to a sort of “passing of the torch,” though.

Let me clarify. When I say “passing of the torch,” I do NOT mean recast. Harrison Ford is, and always will be, Indiana Jones. You cannot replace him.

But I would not be opposed to (if written well) introducing a new character and to start following them on their archaeological adventures.

They can be mentored by Indiana at first, but then they continue on without him. This way, things are kept fresh and new. You can have references and whatnot and continue the unique adventures without replacing anything or anyone that came before.

Just don’t f– up the legacy of “Indiana Jones,” and we’ll be fine. It’s not that hard.

I also hope the new film doesn’t just brush past the events of the fourth. Like I already said, I enjoyed it, and I know there are plenty of people out there who would agree with me.

I assume Shia LaBeouf will not be coming back, but don’t just brush over his character, address something about it.

What about Karen Allen? She played Marion, Indiana’s love interest in the first film who made a return in the fourth, where they got married in the end. 

She wasn’t shown in the trailer for the new movie and it’s not even confirmed if she’s returning or not. What’s up with that?

I’m running out of space, so I’ll conclude this with one final thing I hope the new film has: a scene that traumatizes an entire generation of children.

I’m sort of joking, but my point is “Indiana Jones” has never shied away from violent and straight-up horror-like scenes.

I mean, look at the first film: it had the famous face-melting scene. The second film had…well, every scene in that one was more or less disturbing. The third one had yet another face-melting scene, and the fourth had that fire ant scene that even made me scared of visiting any South American jungle.

So, is it really an Indiana Jones film if it doesn’t include a scene that traumatizes a bunch of children? Just food for thought.

Yet, it’s Disney, so who really knows what’s going to happen. 

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