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    Public Safety investigates stolen catalytic converters

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    Racial Epithets vs Political Disagreement

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    Annual Pink Out game adapts to COVID precautions

    Valparaiso hands Drake Men’s Basketball first loss of the season

    Valparaiso hands Drake Men’s Basketball first loss of the season

    Hockey Fights Cancer

    The Class of 2025 Tennis Players

    “Raise Your Voice” Documentary Supports Student Journalism

    Bearwell, readers: A 2020 season recap and column goodbye

    Hockey Fights Cancer

    Interview with Drake tennis player Ines Stephani

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    Statement From Professor Beth Younger

    Drake College Republicans’ Letter to the Editor

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    Bulldog Blitz 1: December 7, 2010

    The Sports Report 2010 7: 11/09/2010

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    Rainbow Union Empowers the LGBTQ+ Community at Drake

    Avengers: Endgame Predictions

    Avengers: Endgame Predictions

    Drake professors define their teaching experiences

    Evening at the observatory: Is There an Anti-Me?

    Evening at the observatory: Is There an Anti-Me?

    Bulldogs football completes 9th winning season in 10 years

    You can be the force to finally change Drake’s culture

    Student press is essential for letting students’ voices be heard

    Rolle breaks Drake triple jump record

    Rolle breaks Drake triple jump record

    First-year uses photo talent to market Drake’s campus

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Old Fashioned Insults That Could Still Work Today

byCELIA BROCKER
March 11, 2020
in Commentary
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by CELIA BROCKER

The english language has evolved so much that there are some words and phrases that are lost on our modern ears. It’s a shame, because there were some really great clapbacks way back then. If you’d like to impress your friends with knowledge, try out one of these long lost insults. Don’t let their old-fashioned nature scare you away – they still pack quite a punch. 

Man of straw – Refers to a scarecrow, an imaginary man placed in a field to scare away birds. This insult describes a person who deceives you at first glance and is actually of little consequence. 

Zounderkite – This applies to someone whose stupid conduct results in awkward mistakes. Like the three stooges, for example. 

Rum-gagger – The term was used to describe a cheat who tells extravagant tales of sufferings in order to obtain money from sympathizers. The next time you hear one of your biddies telling a tall-tale you know isn’t true, try using this one. 

Shooler – You know that one person who’s always showing up uninvited, taking advantage of your hospitality and forcing their company on you? They’re a shooler. 

Gobslotch – This describes someone a greedy/clownish person. We all know one of those, don’t we? 

Sinworm – A vile/sinful creature is described as a sinworm. The next time you’re confronted by a corrupt individual, now you’ll have something more creative to call them. 

Pregnant scholar – Not quite the first image that popped into your head. This term describes a drunkard, someone who is drunk by the middle of the morning. 

Windy-wallets – This basically means a noisy person, maybe someone who takes control of the conversation too many times. Like that one annoying relative you always try to avoid at family gatherings. 

Guddler – A guddler means a greedy drinker, someone who likes drinking way too much. If you ever need to tell someone to back off the drinking for the night, you could try this. They probably won’t know what it means and may not even know they’re being called out.  

Counter-caster – Basically, this is a contemptuous name for a mathematician, book-keeper or something similar. 

Spatherdab – Ever known someone who was a horrible gossip? They used to be referred to as a spatherdab, or someone who went from house to house dispensing news. 

Gump – This is used to call somebody foolish, a dolt, an idiot, take your pick. So that’s where the name Forrest Gump came from.

CELIA BROCKER

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